'Dear Friends' July 2011

Week of July 4, 2011 Prayer Requests    Help for Men Who Are Caregivers Dear Friends:        We had already been writing about family caregiving for almost 15 years but, we have to confess, the men surprised us.        When we began giving presentations on caregiving at parishes and national conferences some men stood at the back of the hall. Others sat in the chairs way over to the side. A few asked questions or shared a concern but many only listened, accepted the printed material (every piece of printed material), and were on their way.        We realized their showing up was a big step for some of them — raised in a “Gary Cooper” culture that suggested a “real man” was strong and silent, was someone who didn’t need or ask for help.        Males are still in the minority when we give a presentation or host an information booth. Women still outnumber men as members of the Friends of St. John the Caregiver. Most phone calls, e-mails and letters to us are from women caregivers.        But the men are there. And, it seems, their number is growing. A 2009 report by the National Alliance for Caregiving in collaboration with AARP says about a third of family caregivers are men.        "Help for Men Who Are Caregivers" is the newest Topic on YourAgingParent.com and it's the subject for the July edition of "Catholic Caregivers" at CatholicCaregivers.com. - - -        We've also posted the July Bulletin Briefs and Prayers of Intercession at CatholicCaregivers.com. - - -         This week we're so pleased to welcome Maferete Elizabeth N. of Lesotho, Africa, as the newest member of the Friends of St. John the Caregiver. (The first from that country!) Please keep her and her intentions in your prayers. She has promised to pray for you and yours.       And we cordially invite you to join the Friends of St. John the Caregiver! (FSJC's programs include YourAgingParent.com and CatholicCaregivers.com.) You can find out more about becoming a member here.        No meetings, no dues. All we ask is that you pray for caregivers and those receiving care. Our members include caregivers, care-receivers, and those who support both (including quite a few former caregivers).        You can:         sign up on-line here                 or call us toll-free at 1-800-392-JOHN (5646)                or print and mail an application form.        God bless you!                                                           Monica and Bill To contact us To join FSJC To make a donation To view or make prayer requests Materials order form Past "Dear Friends" letters "Among Friends" quarterly newsletter

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Week of July 11, 2011 Prayer Requests    Small Favors, Big Help Dear Friends:        It seems safe to say most caregivers hesitate to ask others for help. And, it seems safe to say, many of those caregivers' family members and friends would like to help but -- time and again -- their offers are politely turned down.        That might not be such a good idea.        What seems to you to be a very big favor (you who are so tired and overloaded from doing so many things) may really be a very small one. A simple one that your friend or family member wants to do to help you.         We'll give you an example. One caregiver said that on his to-do list was stopping by the department of motor vehicles to pick up a temporary handicapped-parking permit. The thought of facing the DMV office was more than he could handle but the couple needed that permit. When his sister-in-law offered to "run out and get it" he said that would be great. She returned about an hour later, permit in hand.        "Oh, you don't get them at the DMV," she reported. "I stopped there and they said I needed to go to the licensing place. So I went there." She smiled. Happy to have helped.        He imagined if he had gone to the DMV and been told to go to a different office in a different part of town. It would have been . . . overwhelming.        We encourage you to take advantage of offers to help. And to ask for help when the offers aren't coming your way. Weeding the front flower bed, picking up some postage stamps, getting the car washed, hauling away that bag of donated goods to St. Vinnie's, and on and on . . . None of those seem like a big deal if you're rested and not overloaded. That's why most times, for most folks, they aren't a big deal.        But those little favors can mean a lot to you.        A small suggestion: Consider making a to-do list that you can refer to when someone asks how he or she can help. - - -         This week we're so pleased to welcome Carol N. of Indiana and Becky G. of Ohio as the the newest members of the Friends of St. John the Caregiver. Please keep them and their intentions in your prayers. They have promised to pray for you and yours.       And we cordially invite you to join the Friends of St. John the Caregiver! (FSJC's programs include YourAgingParent.com and CatholicCaregivers.com.) You can find out more about becoming a member here.        No meetings, no dues. All we ask is that you pray for caregivers and those receiving care. Our members include caregivers, care-receivers, and those who support both (including quite a few former caregivers).        You can:         sign up on-line here                 or call us toll-free at 1-800-392-JOHN (5646)                or print and mail an application form.        God bless you!                                                           Monica and Bill To contact us To join FSJC To make a donation To view or make prayer requests Materials order form Past "Dear Friends" letters "Among Friends" quarterly newsletter

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Week of July 18, 2011 Prayer Requests    Your (Big, Tough) Guardian Dear Dear Friends:        Ten or fifteen years ago angels were hot in popular culture. From television shows to Hallmark trinkets, they seemed to be everywhere. But, of course, once sales slipped another trend hit marketing. It seems the latest is vampires and zombies. (Wizards have been holding steady for the last decade thanks to Harry Potter.)        No wonder it's easy to forget that among all those creatures, angels are the real ones. Better still, and even more amazing, you have one assigned to help you. And so does your care-receiver.        In the words of the Catechism of the Catholic Church, No. 336:        From its beginning until death, human life is surrounded by their watchful care and intercession. "Beside each believer stands an angel as protector and shepherd leading him to life."        You can read more about the Church's teaching on angels here. - - -         This week we're so pleased to welcome Bernadette M. of Texas and Kathy W. of Arkansas as the the newest members of the Friends of St. John the Caregiver. Please keep them and their intentions in your prayers. They have promised to pray for you and yours.       And we cordially invite you to join the Friends of St. John the Caregiver! (FSJC's programs include YourAgingParent.com and CatholicCaregivers.com.) You can find out more about becoming a member here.        No meetings, no dues. All we ask is that you pray for caregivers and those receiving care. Our members include caregivers, care-receivers, and those who support both (including quite a few former caregivers).        You can:         sign up on-line here                 or call us toll-free at 1-800-392-JOHN (5646)                or print and mail an application form.        God bless you!                                                           Monica and Bill To contact us To join FSJC To make a donation To view or make prayer requests Materials order form Past "Dear Friends" letters "Among Friends" quarterly newsletter

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Week of July 25, 2011 Prayer Requests    Thank You for Your Help; How May We Help You? Dear Friends:        First, thank you so much to the caregivers, family members, parishes, dioceses, priests, nuns and others who have asked for some of the free material we're able to offer. (Free because of our wonderful donors.)        And second, if there's something you'd like, or you know a caregiver who could use what we offer, please just contact us and we'll pop in the mail.        You can find the order form here. - - -         This week we're so pleased to welcome Peggy G. of Texas and Cindy D. of Indiana as the the newest members of the Friends of St. John the Caregiver. Please keep them and their intentions in your prayers. They have promised to pray for you and yours.       And we cordially invite you to join the Friends of St. John the Caregiver! (FSJC's programs include YourAgingParent.com and CatholicCaregivers.com.) You can find out more about becoming a member here.        No meetings, no dues. All we ask is that you pray for caregivers and those receiving care. Our members include caregivers, care-receivers, and those who support both (including quite a few former caregivers).        You can:         sign up on-line here                 or call us toll-free at 1-800-392-JOHN (5646)                or print and mail an application form.        God bless you!                                                           Monica and Bill To contact us To join FSJC To make a donation To view or make prayer requests Materials order form Past "Dear Friends" letters "Among Friends" quarterly newsletter