First, we want to thank those who have recently sent
letters and e-mails saying how much they appreciate the
Friends of St. John the
Caregiver
-- including, especially, the prayers being said by its
members -- and the programs FSJC offers. Your kind words
mean a great deal to us.
And, second, we want to give a little update on
some new ways help is being offered to family
caregivers:
--Liguori
Publications has come out with a 24-page pamphlet titled
“Caregiving: Keys to Survival and Revival.”
It’s based on an article we wrote for the January 2009
Liguorian magazine.
--The United States Conference of Catholic
Bishops has launched a Web site named
ForYourMarriage.org.
It offers a lot of helpful and interesting material for
husbands and wives, including — we’re very happy to
report — some
articles
that come from YourAgingParent.com.
--Both the pamphlet and bishops’ Web site
material are adapted from Monica’s
“A Catholic Guide to Caring for Your Aging Parent”
(Loyola, 2006). Amazon.com now also offers a
“Kindle-edition”
(digital reader edition) of the book. (If your
familiar with the book -- and like it -- we would
appreciate your taking the time to write a short review
at Amazon! Just
scroll down the page there and click the "Create
your own review" button.")
- - -
Please join us in welcoming Elizabeth B. of Wisconsin as
the newest member of the Friends of St. John the
Caregiver. Elizabeth has promised to keep caregivers and
care-receivers in her prayers. Please keep her
intentions in yours.
Once again, we cordially invite you to join, too! You can find out more about becoming a member here.
No meetings, no dues. All we ask is that
you pray for caregivers and those receiving care. Our members include
caregivers, care-receivers, and those who support both
(including quite a few former caregivers). You can:
Folks in the Seattle area and Western Washington state
aren't used to hot weather. We start grumbling if it
hits 80 degrees. About
two weeks ago it reached
103! A new record for Seattle and one most of us hope to
never see again around here. Now it's a little cooler than normal
for August: low to mid-60s, with a chance of a shower or two. After
a few days of very hot weather, everyone seemed to
adjust to it. Once it got cooler, we all adapted to
that, too.
That can be how caregiving is. Whatever
happens to be right now -- a loved one facing surgery or
in the hospital or doing OK or having a worrisome medical
appointment coming up -- can seem like the way it's
always been. After several hard days in a row, it's easy
to forget there have been -- and mostly likely will be
-- good days to come. After a stretch of good days, or
challenging days but with challenges we've become
accustomed to, it can seem shocking when a hard day, a
more difficult challenge, pops up.
Then, too, when a care-receiver has
been feeling poorly for a while, when the pain has been
there a few days, it can seem he or she has always felt
poorly. Has always been in pain. Will always
be in pain.
We know that some people -- both
caregivers and care-receivers -- find it helpful to keep
a little daily log of what's going on, including how
they feel. That can make it easier to remember the good
days on those bad days. And to spot a pattern of when --
and maybe why -- those bad days pop up.
This is simply a suggestion. Something to
consider. We certainly don't want to add to your to-do
list. (Or worse, your I-should-do- this list!) So we'll
end with the story of one husband's solution to a
successful to-do list. When his wife couldn't figure out
how he always managed to have every item crossed off,
she finally asked his secret. "Easy," he replied. "I
don't write it on there until I've already done it."
- - -
Please join us in welcoming Jean S. of Minnesota and
Kerry B. of New York. They're
the newest member of the Friends of St. John the
Caregiver. They've promised to keep caregivers and
care-receivers in their prayers. Please keep their
intentions in yours.
Once again, we cordially invite you to join, too! You can find out more about becoming a member here.
No meetings, no dues. All we ask is that
you pray for caregivers and those receiving care. Our members include
caregivers, care-receivers, and those who support both
(including quite a few former caregivers). You can:
Several years ago, when we first started sending out the
quarterly newsletter, "Among Friends," we were surprised
at the
number of recipients who sent back an e-mail or
mailed a note. Now we know those are coming and look
forward to touching base with FSJC members and others.
(We've posted the summer 2009 newsletter
here.)
Sometimes it's a "thanks." Other times it
may be a prayer request. Then, too, it's not uncommon
that we hear from a caregiver whose caregiving duties
have ended. His or her aging parent or spouse has died.
The writers may include some details about their
care-receiver's final weeks or about the funeral, thank
the members of the Friends of St. John the Caregiver for
the prayers that have been said on the family's behalf,
and comment on how -- looking back now -- the time spent
caregiving was a deeply spiritual period in their lives.
They and their loved ones were on holy ground.
That's not to say these caregivers aren't
grieving. They are. But, quite often, already they're
very grateful for the opportunity they had to help
their loved ones. Not that it was always easy. It
wasn't. Not that they thought they did a perfect job.
They don't think they did. (And, since none of us is
perfect, it seems safe to assume they didn't do a
perfect job.) Still . . .
The blessings and graces a caregiver
receives because he or she is helping a loved one don't
end when that loved one dies and the caregiving duties
are over.
Please join us this week in praying
especially for those whose loved ones have recently
died.
- - -
Once again, we cordially invite you to join
the Friends of St. John the Caregiver. You can find out more about becoming a member here.
No meetings, no dues. All we ask is that
you pray for caregivers and those receiving care. Our members include
caregivers, care-receivers, and those who support both
(including quite a few former caregivers). You can:
At times, everyday life can be overwhelming. At times, a caregiver's everyday life can be . . . more than
overwhelming.
This week we offer one of our favorite
bits of advice from St. Francis de Sales:
Please join us in welcoming Janna A. of Mississippi and
Michael D. of California as the newest members of the
Friends of St. John the Caregiver. They have promised to
keep caregivers and care-receivers in their prayers.
Please keep their intentions in yours.
Once again, we cordially invite you to join, too! You can find out more about becoming a member here.
No meetings, no dues. All we ask is that
you pray for caregivers and those receiving care. Our members include
caregivers, care-receivers, and those who support both
(including quite a few former caregivers). You can:
As we do every month, we've updated the material at
CatholicCaregivers.com: a flier ("A Legal and
Financial Paperwork
Checklist");
Bulletin Briefs; and "Prayers of Intercession." It
occurred to us that those four or five weekly prayers
might be something that can be used not only by a parish
for Sunday Mass but by individuals looking for a little
help with their private prayers, too. Each is based on
one of the Sunday readings and has a caregiver "spin" to
it. These are the prayers for September:
Sunday, September 6,
Twenty-third Sunday in Ordinary Time Isaiah 35:4-7a/James 2:1-5/Mark 7:31-37 For family caregivers whose hearts are frightened: May they find
strength and courage, knowing the Lord is with them,
we pray to the Lord.
Sunday, September 13,
Twenty-fourth Sunday in Ordinary Time Isaiah 50:5-9a/James 2:14-18/Mark 8:27-35 In thanksgiving for family caregivers who, day after day,
demonstrate their faith by their works,
we pray to the Lord.
Sunday, September 20,
Twenty-fifth Sunday in Ordinary Time Wisdom 2:12, 17-20/James 3:16—4:3/Mark 9:30-3 For those who have recently been called to serve a loved one as his
or her caregiver,
we pray to the Lord.
Sunday, September 27,
Twenty-sixth Sunday in Ordinary Time Numbers 11:25-29/James 5:1-6/Mark 9:38-43, 45,
47-48 That God will richly blessing all those who give “a cup of water” —
and so much more — to a loved one who needs care,
we pray to the Lord.
And this is one of the
Bulletin Briefs:
“Caring
for another as a person of infinite value is more
than a statement of faith. It is the lived
experience of sacredness.” --Office of Laity and Family Life, Archdiocese of
St. Louis
As always, you and your loved ones are in our prayers.
- - -
Once again, we cordially invite you to join the Friends
of St. John the Caregiver. You can find out more about
becoming a member here.
No meetings, no dues. All we ask is that
you pray for caregivers and those receiving care. Our members include
caregivers, care-receivers, and those who support both
(including quite a few former caregivers). You can:
two weeks ago it reached
103! A new record for Seattle and one most of us hope to
never see again around here. Now it's a little cooler than normal
for August: low to mid-60s, with a chance of a shower or two. After
a few days of very hot weather, everyone seemed to
adjust to it. Once it got cooler, we all adapted to
that, too.
number of recipients who sent back an e-mail or
mailed a note. Now we know those are coming and look
forward to touching base with FSJC members and others.
(We've posted the summer 2009 newsletter
At times, everyday life can be overwhelming. At times, a caregiver's everyday life can be . . . more than
overwhelming.
Checklist");
Bulletin Briefs; and "Prayers of Intercession." It
occurred to us that those four or five weekly prayers
might be something that can be used not only by a parish
for Sunday Mass but by individuals looking for a little
help with their private prayers, too. Each is based on
one of the Sunday readings and has a caregiver "spin" to
it. These are the prayers for September: